Marco the Phoenix (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
fierybluebird) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
discedo_logs2012-10-02 04:05 am
fierybluebird) wrote in discedo_logs2012-10-02 04:05 am
Drink and drink and drink and drink and drink and drink and fight
Who: Marco & Tatsumi
Where: Northern Lights Bar
When: The night after Flandre's post when Cube left / October First
Rating: PG-15 IDK Marco's in a bad mood, Tatsumi is Tatsumi. What is censorship ratings? It probably won't be that bad.
Summary: Even the world's strongest don't stay strong forever. When Whitebeard was here, Marco held himself together better but now that he's gone, losing Cube is shaking him up a lot more than expected. And also drinking. A lot of it.
The Log:
There were a lot of things Marco never let anyone see. Secrets he didn't tell even his father, things he kept locked up tighter than the marines kept Impel Down. Not because he didn't trust his family. He'd trust them with anything and everything. But so long as Marco doesn't worry, then his brothers, his family know that they have less to fear. Existentially even Marco knows his relationship with his father could be a little weird like that. Marco was always scared to death of Whitebeard getting sick, getting even more injured, getting hurt, dying. And then it all happened anyway and there was nothing Marco could do to stop it. And yet knowing it would happen, that it was inevitable, that someday the strongest man in the world would still cease to be, would no longer be there, would no longer be the strongest man in the world, hadn't stopped Marco from worrying.
And yet for all that worry, he affected a carefree attitude when it suited him. Because it was one thing to worry privately himself, it was quite another to let his little brothers pick up on that worry and fret about it too. Those little idiots who didn't even have the common sense to step back from an enemy using his haki at full-blast; how would they handle it if Marco was openly scared of something? They needed him to be nearly as strong as Whitebeard. So that if, no, when Whitebeard fell, they'd still have their phoenix big brother looking after them, holding them together, making sure that anyone who fucked with them would still get their asses handed to them. And so, there were quite a few things about Marco he kept to himself. He couldn't let his Pops worry anymore than he absolutely had to, because if Pops was worried, Marco would worry too and vice versa.
And now... now he was alone again.
No, not alone. He had family here. A safety net. He still had people he promised to look after, people Marco would try to die for before letting them down. Hong Kong, Flandre, Leanne, he'd made promises to them, to people who cared about them, and to himself to keep looking after them no matter what.
But his initial family was gone. The first few people in Luceti he'd adopted, who'd adopted him. Ace, whom Marco still always worried never found the added happiness he deserved. Seifer, Japan, Luffy, even Eridan, though Marco'd been banned from adopting him, he still had a tough time thinking of him as anything other than at least a best friend.
Marco checked the stores. He'd been stockpiling twice as hard when Whitebeard was there, and his Pops had somehow managed to drink less, probably because he could tell how hard it was for Marco to get supplies. Still, that hadn't stopped Whitebeard before. Maybe it was the chip thing. Or not being at sea, or not having 1600 brothers around. Whatever the case, Marco had more supplies than he knew what to do with.
Which was just as well, because what he wanted was to get really drunk the last time he could get a chance to without someone noticing. He had no intentions of ever letting his adopted niece worry, and that would mean being as responsible and almost as respectable as Cube. Responsible Marco could do. He wasn't the first division commander... nearly captain now, for nothing. But pirates had pretty different standards of what that meant. Pretty much any pirate who drank less than Shanks and didn't let little kids stab themselves under the eye and accidentally eat devil fruit could be considered "responsible" where he was from. Hell, even the heroes were psychos who punched children to make them tougher, so really, the bar was set very low. And Marco wanted to do better than that.
Would do better than that. No matter what. He absolutely would not let her down if he had any say it.
Just tonight however, he was going to get bombed. Because fuck everything. Fuck Discedo and being untold lightyears away from his family that needed him. Fuck this place for teasing him with a brother he'd lost, and then making him lose him again. Fuck this place for not giving him a way to fix it. No, he wasn't owed that, and he didn't think he was. Any time with Ace or Whitebeard was extra time he couldn't have had otherwise. But right then it still almost seemed like a con. A way to make him so much more complacent about living without all his 1600 brothers, 50,000 allies, and millions of islanders he was supposed to, or at least wanted to look after. A way to say he could have it all, but the price, the price would always be the same.
The price was that he'd always be the last one standing. Phoenix. Nearly unstoppable. He'd survive, even if he didn't want to. Because there would always be someone else to look after. Someone else who needed him as much as he needed that. And it'd never be done. It was his saving grace, and it was his downfall. Near immortality, but at the price of outliving, outstaying everything he loved and cherished. And maybe there was more than the here and now. Maybe there was an afterlife or worlds far far away. But if such things existed, if they were real, there was no guarantee Marco could get there, and even if he could, it would be for a very very long time yet. And until then, everything moved on, while he continued with the price of cherished memories and a longing for things always out of reach.
Clearly booze was in order. Which was how he downed about five bottles before remembering a promise not to drink alone. Well shit. Part of him wanted to say fuck it. That person wasn't around to enforce it or get upset about it, and aside from which, if he was already alone, who the hell was going to know?
Well, he'd know. Stupid promises to people not even around. Stupid them not even being around. Time to bug his puppydog.
Where: Northern Lights Bar
When: The night after Flandre's post when Cube left / October First
Rating: PG-15 IDK Marco's in a bad mood, Tatsumi is Tatsumi. What is censorship ratings? It probably won't be that bad.
Summary: Even the world's strongest don't stay strong forever. When Whitebeard was here, Marco held himself together better but now that he's gone, losing Cube is shaking him up a lot more than expected. And also drinking. A lot of it.
The Log:
There were a lot of things Marco never let anyone see. Secrets he didn't tell even his father, things he kept locked up tighter than the marines kept Impel Down. Not because he didn't trust his family. He'd trust them with anything and everything. But so long as Marco doesn't worry, then his brothers, his family know that they have less to fear. Existentially even Marco knows his relationship with his father could be a little weird like that. Marco was always scared to death of Whitebeard getting sick, getting even more injured, getting hurt, dying. And then it all happened anyway and there was nothing Marco could do to stop it. And yet knowing it would happen, that it was inevitable, that someday the strongest man in the world would still cease to be, would no longer be there, would no longer be the strongest man in the world, hadn't stopped Marco from worrying.
And yet for all that worry, he affected a carefree attitude when it suited him. Because it was one thing to worry privately himself, it was quite another to let his little brothers pick up on that worry and fret about it too. Those little idiots who didn't even have the common sense to step back from an enemy using his haki at full-blast; how would they handle it if Marco was openly scared of something? They needed him to be nearly as strong as Whitebeard. So that if, no, when Whitebeard fell, they'd still have their phoenix big brother looking after them, holding them together, making sure that anyone who fucked with them would still get their asses handed to them. And so, there were quite a few things about Marco he kept to himself. He couldn't let his Pops worry anymore than he absolutely had to, because if Pops was worried, Marco would worry too and vice versa.
And now... now he was alone again.
No, not alone. He had family here. A safety net. He still had people he promised to look after, people Marco would try to die for before letting them down. Hong Kong, Flandre, Leanne, he'd made promises to them, to people who cared about them, and to himself to keep looking after them no matter what.
But his initial family was gone. The first few people in Luceti he'd adopted, who'd adopted him. Ace, whom Marco still always worried never found the added happiness he deserved. Seifer, Japan, Luffy, even Eridan, though Marco'd been banned from adopting him, he still had a tough time thinking of him as anything other than at least a best friend.
Marco checked the stores. He'd been stockpiling twice as hard when Whitebeard was there, and his Pops had somehow managed to drink less, probably because he could tell how hard it was for Marco to get supplies. Still, that hadn't stopped Whitebeard before. Maybe it was the chip thing. Or not being at sea, or not having 1600 brothers around. Whatever the case, Marco had more supplies than he knew what to do with.
Which was just as well, because what he wanted was to get really drunk the last time he could get a chance to without someone noticing. He had no intentions of ever letting his adopted niece worry, and that would mean being as responsible and almost as respectable as Cube. Responsible Marco could do. He wasn't the first division commander... nearly captain now, for nothing. But pirates had pretty different standards of what that meant. Pretty much any pirate who drank less than Shanks and didn't let little kids stab themselves under the eye and accidentally eat devil fruit could be considered "responsible" where he was from. Hell, even the heroes were psychos who punched children to make them tougher, so really, the bar was set very low. And Marco wanted to do better than that.
Would do better than that. No matter what. He absolutely would not let her down if he had any say it.
Just tonight however, he was going to get bombed. Because fuck everything. Fuck Discedo and being untold lightyears away from his family that needed him. Fuck this place for teasing him with a brother he'd lost, and then making him lose him again. Fuck this place for not giving him a way to fix it. No, he wasn't owed that, and he didn't think he was. Any time with Ace or Whitebeard was extra time he couldn't have had otherwise. But right then it still almost seemed like a con. A way to make him so much more complacent about living without all his 1600 brothers, 50,000 allies, and millions of islanders he was supposed to, or at least wanted to look after. A way to say he could have it all, but the price, the price would always be the same.
The price was that he'd always be the last one standing. Phoenix. Nearly unstoppable. He'd survive, even if he didn't want to. Because there would always be someone else to look after. Someone else who needed him as much as he needed that. And it'd never be done. It was his saving grace, and it was his downfall. Near immortality, but at the price of outliving, outstaying everything he loved and cherished. And maybe there was more than the here and now. Maybe there was an afterlife or worlds far far away. But if such things existed, if they were real, there was no guarantee Marco could get there, and even if he could, it would be for a very very long time yet. And until then, everything moved on, while he continued with the price of cherished memories and a longing for things always out of reach.
Clearly booze was in order. Which was how he downed about five bottles before remembering a promise not to drink alone. Well shit. Part of him wanted to say fuck it. That person wasn't around to enforce it or get upset about it, and aside from which, if he was already alone, who the hell was going to know?
Well, he'd know. Stupid promises to people not even around. Stupid them not even being around. Time to bug his puppydog.
no subject
What was odd was the disappearance of Marco. Sure, he could have been looking for a new place for the little ones, but Tatsumi's nose knew better. He followed the pirate's scent to a most familiar place; The Northern Lights Bar.
Silently letting himself in the back door, Tatsumi surveyed the bar. What he saw brought a small smirk to his lips. He had figured when Marco's pops went missing that a drinking binge like this would have happened a lot sooner. But that's partly what kept the phoenix so interesting to Tatsumi. Marco wasn't as predictable as he let on.
After a few moments, Tatsumi makes his presence known. His footfalls make the floor creek slightly as he makes his way over to where Marco was downing his booze.
"I hope ya left some for me." He glances about at all the alcohol. His nose could tell Marco had already indulged himself quite a bit.
no subject
"Good timing actually," he mumbled, "I was just going to find you. I think I found a good spot for us to move to. Gotta have you check it out and make sure you like it too, eh?" Marco leaned on an arm and tried not to slump.
no subject
"Sure. But don't ya think it's a bit early to start celebrating the new place before ya have even moved in?" A corner of his lips tugged upwards as he took another sip.
no subject
He chugged some more alcohol seeking a more numb state. "It's like when a new era comes and you say farewell to the old. Except in this case the new era is good and the old is bad. And you don't want to bring the bad into the new. Like a detox. Aye."
no subject
"Ya. I hear ya." He took a generous sip this time. It wasn't like it'd do anything. With his chip out, alcohol did nothing to Tatsumi. It was a small price to pay for power, and at the moment Tatsumi was happy he couldn't be swayed by alcohol. He can watch Marco down it in his place.
"Hard to leave the past behind. Specially when ya don't know where the future is going to take ya."
no subject
Another drink, another slump and Marco mumbled a little incoherently into his arm for a bit before moving the arm to speak more clearly. "I don't want to let go of the past, because right now, even if it's painful and it sucks, it's all I have of them. It's disloyal to just move on, even though they'd want me to be happy."
It was obvious just how much he'd drunk by now, or he never would have said this out loud.
no subject
"They, as in your pops n' stuff?" By the way Marco was speaking, the way he was acting, it felt like a whole lot more, but considering the size of Marco's 'family', that wasn't all that surprising.
What was surprising was the confession. Tatsumi remained a bit skeptical, but hardly. After all, he didn't know how much it took for Marco to really lose himself, but he seemed pretty damn close. Tatsumi hadn't ever seen the bird at such a low. In a deranged way, it was exciting. Like discovering something new in a place you've been a hundred times.
"Do ya have to choose one over the other?"
He reached out slowly and have the gold plume on the pirate's head a good pet. Tatsumi knew what sadness felt like since being in Discedo. It was like the same fluke that made him feel love, and sadly they both sucked. At least he had the experience to relate to, even if those nerves were dead now.
"Because I don't think moving on works like that, Birdybird."
no subject
He blinked at little at the head pat, but it wasn't unwelcome either. "I guess it's not forgetting them, but it's not remembering every little detail as vividly either." He took yet another drink. Numbness, all he wanted was to be numb.
"I'm sick of missing them." Another drink and he shook his head. "Even knowing Pops would die someday, I always had to look after my little brothers. It was a never-ending duty so I'd never give up. Even now I've still got Flandre and Leanne to look after, but even that, I might fuck up."
He got up and took a few steps before realizing there really was nothing he could kick in the bar that he wouldn't break if he did. Even the walls. Marco closed his eyes, despite being having Tatsumi in the room -- something his own instincts didn't usually allow for -- and took a few calming breaths with a few balanced yoga stretches. It was the best he could manage under the circumstances.